‘Daddy issues’ is a term that’s thrown around a lot these days, particularly in this online culture where keyboard warriors will turn to any old trending insult if they’re too ignorant to come up with a reasonable argument…

doll cat pvssy
Doll Cat Pvssy aka Poisonous Slutcake

So we hear this phrase ‘daddy issues’ all the time, but what does an issue with one’s father actually demonstrate as? The only significant issue that staggers me on a regular basis is that of male family members believing they own control and entitlement over their female relatives’ social and sexual lives. Is it sweet, protective and super caring when dads make jokes about their daughters not being allowed boyfriends? Are we supposed to find it endearing and compassionate when a brother figure makes humorous threats in reference to men trying it on with their sisters? Thankfully I don’t come from a family where my male relatives could give a fuck about my sex life, but I’ve certainly seen this weird attitude way too many times on TV shows, or even witnessed these kind of remarks among my friends’ families. To be quite frank, it creeps me the fuck out.

I remember when I first realised just quite how fucked up it is for male family members to feel so much entitlement toward their own family’s vaginas! I was 15 and casually indulging in these awkward oral sex sessions with a 16 year old guy I had no attraction to… I just had a desire to have my pussy licked and improve on my cock sucking skills. Anyway, after a fun chat and 69, the dude was walking me home and mentioned something about him being protective over who his 15 year old sister was allowed to date. He seemed somewhat surprised that I hadn’t praised him for being a pro-active older brother, and instead I told him “Well if my older brother’s were so weirdly concerned about my sex life,  you probably wouldn’t have just had your dick sucked.” “She’s only 15” he argued, “She doesn’t know right from wrong and men take advantage of girls.” So I argued back “I’m 15 too though. You’re a 16 year old imbecile with a bedroom full of cocaine, sexing it up with a 15 year old girl, knowing full well that we’re having safe fun, yet for some reason, which I find kind of disturbing, you feel like you have some kind of right to your sister’s vagina and to deny her of exploring life?!” I never saw him again – his breath always wreaked of BBQ takeaway pizza which made me concerned for my vagina’s PH level anyway. But I was just a child and suddenly very painfully aware of the way men basically lose respect for women who have sex, and concerningly, feel the need to preserve respect for their family members through controlling or manipulating their sex lives.

Since that occasion when I was 15, I’ve seen it said many times more that men generally have a lower level of respect for women who do not have the misfortune of being blood related to them. The “It’s not my problem if it can be every other man’s fault” attitude, rather than taking any responsibility for themselves. It’s the classic ‘let’s blame another dude while I’m being a fucking knob right now’. I do find it funny when people throw the term ‘daddy issues’ at me, not only because the most stable relationship my life has ever held is that of the one with my dad, but also because it’s the world’s most pathetic and illogical insult. It’s basically an admission of defeat; ‘oh shit, erm, I have no logical argument and no way to insult you other than to randomly bring up your dad’.  So maybe I have daddy issues because my dad has never wanted possession over my sexuality or to judge who/what I find attractive and gave me the same freedom and respect he’d give anyone else?!

Doll Cat

It just isn’t beguiling to see males ‘stepping up’ and taking a ‘protective/caring role’ by actually just depriving women of control over their own sexuality and freedom; depriving women of choice. Am I upset that I never got to be an overly-pampered daddy’s girl? *cough* Daddy’s girl being a term that gives the male a possessive apostrophe *cough*… Oh I guess I’ve just answered that one. Am I just butt-hurt that my dad never referred to me as a princess? Well no! I’m really glad that I grew up with the idea that men and women should both fend for themselves rather than being taught that girls are little princesses who should stay indoors and rely on men to bring them food and money.

Do we hear jokes about boys not being allowed to date or fathers making aggressive suggestions toward guys bringing a girl home? I’ve never once seen that in any TV show, movie or friend’s house. Depriving women of their freedom or suggesting sex is ‘bad’ is nothing but damaging. Influential, older, role model family members should do nothing but encourage open honesty, safe sex and the freedom to your own opinions and desires. Suggesting female family members shouldn’t have sex just makes them too ashamed to ask for advice from anywhere and leads to ill-educated and more dangerous sex. Suggesting females don’t have the right to choose what kind of man they find sexually attractive does nothing but promote the idea that choice is only a privilege in the hands of men. As a society, it’s about time we stop making jokes about our daughters/sisters/nieces not being able to choose to have a consensual sexual relationship; it’s really not cool. So back to my daddy issues… I guess I’ve realised the biggest issue with my dad right now is that I’ve never gotten around to thanking him for being so fucking cool and accepting all of my ex boyfriends who were closer in age to him than me (lol).